Mind The Sap

Errant ramblings, mostly.

Monday, June 12, 2006

How Not to Order at Starbucks

I've recently been catapulted from Carefree, Summer Dre into full-on Crisis Dre. I have spent the past thirty-six hours or so on autopilot: stoic, scattered, and scared. My mind is racing a mile a minute-- a fact evinced by my ineptitude at quotidian transactions requiring the least possible amount of actual thought. Decision making was difficult today.

This morning in Starbucks, as I was sandwiched in a big line:

Barista: Hi, can I help you?
Me: Uh...
(Barista raises eyebrow)
Me: May I have a... (five second pause)...big...
Barista: Yes?
Me: ...coffee?
Barista (nonplussed): Breakfast Blend or Bold?
Me: Caffinated.
Barista, pointing to a size: This one?
Me: No smaller than that, but bigger than the small one. With room!

I must have looked like an idiot, or one of those customers who purposefully avoid using Starbucks jargon in order to either irk the Baristas or throw them off their game. I intended neither. Nonetheless, in the interest of keeping things simple while the going is rough, perhaps I will drink from the Second Cup's carafe tomorrow.

23 Comments:

Blogger nicole said...

AWWWW! Your Starbucks encounter actually sounds *adorable!* but maybe that's cos I think everything you do is adorable! Hope your adorable tooth is feeling better!

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I am sick of the Starbucks language crap. The coffee is great, but I refuse to join the club. Moreover, I am sick of being corrected. HEY STARBUCKS: It’s AMERICA!!!! If the cup sizes need Italian, why is the “small” size called a TALL, which as we all know is ENGLISH! Is it that the Italian diminishes the size beyond small? Wait, none of that makes sense, a “small” is in a sense “diminished”… kind a…

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