My Word

"Prelimidump" (aka the pre-emptive dump)

What? Dumping him or her before they get the sweet chance, whether or not you actually wanted to end the relationship.
Where? All over the world, although activity itself is best suited to a crowded pub, after no less than one (but no more than three) alcoholic drinks.
Why? Many reasons. Usually occurs after one party “gets wind” of the other’s imminent plan to do some dumpage. Also commonly executed after one party’s shameful act (often involving infidelity/strippers/drugs or some combination therein), thus activating either the guilt or the “holycrapimgonnagetcaught” centre of the brain.
When? Can occur in relationships of all ages, at all stages.
Who? You, me, her, that guy over there. I’d say almost everyone who’s ever been in a relationship has been on either the giving or the receiving end of a prelimidump.